its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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