I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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