Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
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