I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
