i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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