We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I just blew my weed a kiss
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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