Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
