i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
