If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
there is puke in my bra ... again
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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