I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
If I die, sorry about rent.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
