she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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