just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
