Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
im holly from the hills drunk
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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