belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
