I feel great
I just peed on a car
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Randomize
