why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
We named our party play list daddy issues
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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