i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
