I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
