Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
