kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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