I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
