Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
