im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
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