I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
