Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
