He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
