they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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