guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Randomize
