Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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