David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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