Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
