just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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