Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
