Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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