D3 body, D1 cock
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Randomize
