Have you finally orgasmed yet?
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Randomize
