it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
