Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
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