Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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