I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
You're like the curious george of whores
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
