where am i from again
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Randomize
