I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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