She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
