I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Randomize
