I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
