So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
