My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Randomize
