dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
