You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Randomize