i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Boobs speak an international language.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
